1519 words
We'd like to take a serious turn down the darkened hallway of one of life's less pleasant chambers: the realm of the unknown, the territory of the damned, that lightless country that no sun touches. We are of course referring to death, and the fear of it, and what you can do to forget about it and pretend it's not going to happen. Let's kick things off with this scene from The Battle for the Stars in Space, in which Grembler and Hargidor are on the eve of battle against the Army of the Powers:
Grenber: I'm not ready to face this.
Hargidoro: No one is ready to face such things, but that is nonetheless what you signed up for, young soldier!
Grember: What's it like, Hargidero? When you close your eyes for the last time? For you felt the sting of the enemy's touch and passed beyond all thought into The End, but were brought back by the grace of the Fates who determined that it should not yet be? You alone have died and returned to us. What's it like?
Haridogor: White seas. Gray seagulls. Lights on the distant horizon [Hargidor's eyes go distant as he recalls his times of it.] Lights that shine on me. Beeping beepers. Soft cries on the shores of the new land, calling me home and waving at me for coming to them. Quiet music which is nice. Smiling faces. Everyone liked me. I liked it.
[Grembor smiles sadly but is thankful for it and then looks down into his shaking hands that are there and then looks back up at Hargidor and then up more] Grenbier: Well.... that doesn't sound so bad.
Hargnidor: No. No it doesn't. Now you're not scared anymore and you've processed it. Now lock and load, motherfucker, time to kill the bad guys.
(reprinted with permission from the Ger Gret Film Company, a licensed executive subsidiary of Gold Star Productions, est 5255 by Har Horbind, jr, son of successful media company founder Har Borigor)
This scene alone caused me to ascend one level in my psychological development, and I cite it at funerals whenever I see someone in grief. It made the battle better too because when I saw the knights getting slashed in half I thought of Hargideor's speech and realized it was no big deal and the violence was awesome and dark and this is proof that this is not a kid's movie. People die in it and that means it's for adults because adults like death. Do you get it yet? Are you getting this? Do I even need to continue or has the goddamn point been made already? What do you think? Let's take it to a vote. Haha nope just kidding I'm running the show so let's keep going because of that and it and these and those.
And them and these and those and that and let's stay on track please. We have a subject to write about and all points of the outline have to be nailed before we call it a day and I don't give a FUCK ABOUT WHthehrt ehwehttheh t3et so let's go on out to it there and give it what we have and give as good as the gettin' gets gettin' while the gettin's on the getter as foretold in the ancient texts of Gettin' By In The Times of The Texts, written in 586 and revised several times thereafter by the Emperor while we gettin giohajh afdk
The relationship one has with one's mortality deepens as one moves through life. People you love, know, worked with, or connected with briefly on a dating app a few years ago and went on a few dates with and had a terminal illness that she didn't disclose until date 5 haha whatever that's fine we can keep hanging out. All these people will die. They won't exist. They're gone and you're still here dealing with it and thinking about your own life and going to therapy but that's not really helping. All we have are relationships and we will lose those, and they will lose you. How do you deal with this?
Great question! There's a scene from The Battle for the Stars in Space that addresses this exact question. Hargodor is there to guide us through our fear. I've watched this scene at least 3 times today. We've watched him grow and evolve for the last 15 years during this franchise. When he died I absolutely lost it. They had a funeral at the end and afterwards I was sad but I was able to go on with my life a few hours later. I then realized death isn't so bad and just another thing, so I felt ok and I went back to my house to eat things and type out a review of a new rotating tower fan that I bought.
Everything you did in life will end and everyone you know will come to an end. Can you handle the magnitude of this? If not, it's likely because you haven't experienced much loss in your life yet, so watch the funeral scene in The Battle for the Stars in Space where all the surviving characters mourn and you feel all the feels. The movie ends and you understand loss now. This movie is for adults. The point has been made but do you get the point? Do you get this? Are you following along? What's the problem? Need a drink? Haha that's what inspired this post in the first place! What's cool is you can use substances to escape these thoughts and then eventually your body will not be able to tolerate those substances and you'll have to learn how to cope on your own. Or you won't and you'll just die from complications arising from an unhealthy dependence on substances. Haha life is funny that way.
You should stop having social anxiety or feeling self-conscious and just get out there and dance with lively, attractive people while you're young because when you're old you can't do that. Just say hi. Come on man just say hi to her, what's the worst that could happen? You can't take a little time and work on your self-confidence and buy some clothes that fucking fit and figure out how to make someone laugh? The problem is all women are shallow.
Older folks occupy a unique place in our society. They have had decades to contemplate life and acquire a trove of experiences that informs a completed worldview. Elderly people have lost many people close to them: parents, siblings, partners, friends, possibly even their children. In addition to accumulated loss, these people are lucky to have made it so far and they know it. It would be a good idea to show them that scene from The Battle for the Stars in Space because they're going to die soon and need Hargidor's wisdom more than anyone.
You might not make it to old age. You might not make it to next year. However, this is statistically unlikely so don't worry about those weird chest pains or abnormal blood tests. You're young.
The concept of an afterlife has persisted throughout all of human history. Individuals in all parts of the globe, at all times, and at all ages, have incorporated this concept into their relationships with others as they contend with mortality and loss. This is because all these people are wrong and fucking stupid except for me who understands this is irrational superstitious bullshit that only harms you. Stop believing in things without evidence. I am right.
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(this article was originally published at one point but was revised shortly after in light of recent scientific findings that say when you die you die and literally nothing matters so when you lose someone close to you and experience the full force of incomprehensible loss and grief just tell yourself to be rational and be satisfied with that)